Last night, after selling our couches to some friends, Tony and I sat in the empty living room on the floor. It felt good to have one less item to worry about packing but it also reminded us that we were packing. It reminded us that we were leaving. We have been telling our daughter, Soleil, that we are about to go on a big adventure and every day that passes makes it more and more real.
Tony saw this quote from Thomas Aquinas about a ship that continues to capture his imagination and thoughts and make sense of the feelings inside of him, which he started to share in A Ship is Safe in Harbor. We believe that God is asking us to join Him so that He continue the work He has started in us.
“If the primary aim of a captain were to preserve his ship, he would keep it in port forever.” – Thomas Aquinas
For almost seven and a half years Tony and I have been married. Throughout our years we have talked about moving to different cities for lots of reasons. I have always said no. I am comfortable in San Jose. I grew up here. My family is still here. My wonderful friends, whom I consider family, are here. This is a wonderful valley to live in with green and trees all around, not to mention the beach an hour away from here.
But I’m not meant to live for comfort alone. I’m meant to live a full life of faith, hope and joy through the gift of salvation from Jesus. God has brought me slowly and painfully to a place where I think less about my comfort and myself and more about being obedient to what I sense and believe God is asking me to do. In less than a month we will be moving to Arizona and I can honestly say I’m excited! This alone is a testament to how God has softened and changed my heart over the past seven and a half years!
Instead of thinking of my comfort I think about God asking Tony to embrace his shape and to step forward in faithful obedience. I realize that only when Tony does that will he be ready to lead our family in the future, for whatever God has prepared for him and our family. I realize he needs to go back to school to learn more deeply about God and strengthen what makes him, him!
Then I think about Tony’s family in Phoenix. I think about MY mother-in-law. I think about MY two brothers-in-law. I think about MY niece. Each day I think more about them and realize the immense love God has given me for them. I love them no matter what! They are MY family now and forevermore. I will be there for my extended family in a way I have never been able to be so far. I will be there in person. Isn’t that what God did for us through Jesus? I will get to live life with them. I will get to share my love and Jesus’ love for them because they don’t know the love that God has for them.
So maybe I have schooling to do in Arizona too. Learning to love my family like Jesus loves people so that hopefully they see Jesus. I won’t be going to a physical school or even going to an outside job. I will be working to cherish and raise up my children and love and support my husband with a home he hates to leave and longs to return to.
Please pray for us as we step out in faith as we go on an adventure that we both can learn to live not for comfort alone.